Effective Techniques for Managing Anxiety

Raising two strong-willed teens, one of whom is neuro-diverse, has been one of the most rewarding yet challenging journeys of my life. Alongside my husband, an emotional and positive intelligence coach, we’ve navigated the ups and downs of parenting with a focus on mental fitness. I want to share some real, practical techniques that have helped us manage anxiety - both theirs and mine - in a way that feels authentic and achievable. If you’re juggling the emotional rollercoaster of parenting and your own triggers, I hope this post offers some comfort and useful tools.

Understanding Anxiety in Our Family Life

Anxiety can sneak into family life in many ways. For us, it often shows up as overwhelm during school transitions, social situations, or even just the daily pressure of managing emotions. My neuro-diverse teen sometimes experiences sensory overload, which can trigger anxiety and often struggles with self-confidence in social settings. As a mum, I’ve had to learn how to stay calm and grounded, even when my own emotions want to take over.

One thing I’ve realised is that anxiety isn’t just about feeling worried. It’s a physical, mental, and emotional experience that affects the whole family. When I started to understand this, I could better support my children and myself. It’s okay to admit that sometimes we don’t have all the answers, but there are techniques that can help us all feel more in control.

Practical Techniques to Handle Anxiety in Everyday Life

Here are some of the most effective strategies we use daily. These are simple, actionable, and can be adapted to fit your family’s unique needs.

1. Breathing Exercises

When anxiety hits, the first thing I teach my children (and remind myself) is to focus on the breath. Anxiety is simply our brain trying to keep us safe by reacting to what is going on around us. Deep, slow breathing helps calm the nervous system and brings us back to the present moment.

• Try the 4-7-8 technique: breathe in for 4 seconds, hold for 7, and breathe out for 8.

• Use a breathing ball or app to make it fun for teens.

• Practice together as a family to normalise it.

  
  

2. Creating a Safe Space

Having a designated calm corner or room where anyone can retreat to when feeling overwhelmed is a game-changer. This space should be quiet, comfortable, and filled with comforting items like soft blankets, favourite books, or sensory toys.

• Encourage your child to use this space without judgement.

• Respect your own need for a break in this space too.

  
  

3. Journaling and Thought Tracking

Writing down worries can help externalise anxious thoughts. We use simple journals where my teens jot down what’s bothering them and then write a positive or realistic counter-thought.

• This helps harness the power of thoughts and challenge negative thinking.

• It’s a great way to build emotional intelligence and self-awareness.

  
  

4. Movement and Physical Activity

Exercise is a natural anxiety buster. Whether it’s a walk, yoga, or dancing around the living room, moving the body helps release tension and boosts mood.

• Find activities your children enjoy.

• Join in to model healthy habits.

  
  

5. Routine and Predictability

For neuro-diverse children especially, knowing what to expect reduces anxiety. We keep a visual schedule at home and prepare for changes in advance.

• Use calendars, timers, or apps to support routines.

• Talk through upcoming events to reduce uncertainty.

  
  

These techniques are part of a broader set of anxiety management techniques that I have developed through accredited programmes. They’re designed to empower families to face big emotions with confidence.

What is the 3 3 3 Rule for Anxiety?

One technique that has been incredibly helpful for both me and my children is the 3 3 3 rule. It’s a simple grounding exercise that helps interrupt anxious spirals by focusing on the present moment.

Here’s how it works:

• 3 things you can see: Look around and name three objects.

• 3 things you can hear: Listen carefully and identify three sounds.

• 3 things you can feel: Notice three physical sensations, like the texture of your clothes or the feeling of your feet on the floor.

  
  

This exercise is quick and effective, especially when anxiety feels overwhelming. It brings your mind back to the here and now, breaking the cycle of worry.

I encourage parents to teach this to their children and practice it themselves. It’s a tool you can use anywhere - in the car, at school, or even during a stressful family moment.

Managing Our Own Emotions as Parents

Parenting children with big emotions and anxiety can trigger our own feelings of frustration, guilt, or helplessness. I’ve learned that managing my own emotional health is just as important as supporting my children and I coach parents on how to do this in a simple and extremely effective way through my Positive Intelligence programme.

Here are some ways I take care of myself:

• Mindfulness and meditation: Even five minutes a day helps me reset.

• Seeking support: Talking to friends, joining parent groups, or working with a coach.

• Setting boundaries: Knowing when to say no and prioritise my wellbeing.

• Celebrating small wins: Acknowledging progress, no matter how small, keeps me motivated.

  
  

Remember, you can’t pour from an empty cup. Taking care of yourself models emotional intelligence and resilience for your children.

Embracing Change and Growing Emotional Intelligence Together

Anxiety often comes from fear of the unknown or change. Helping our children embrace change as a natural part of life builds resilience.

• Talk openly about feelings around change.

• Use stories or role-play to explore new situations.

• Encourage problem-solving and flexibility.

  
  

Growing emotional intelligence is a journey we take as a family. It’s about recognising emotions, understanding triggers, and developing healthy coping strategies. With patience and practice, we can all become stronger and more confident.

I hope these insights and techniques resonate with you. Remember, managing anxiety is not about perfection but progress. If you want to explore more tools and support, my accredited programmes offer a wealth of resources tailored for families like ours.

Together, we can raise emotionally intelligent, confident children while nurturing our own mental fitness.

Stay strong and take it one step at a time.